A Wonderful Surprise

Not long after her mother passed, a Facebook friend from across the sea reached

out to me. She said that, if I was willing, she’d like me to have some treasures that 

she had first given to her mom.

I was touched by her kind offer, especially when she told me that Chartres, where the 

items were purchased when they were visiting there together, is a church dedicated 

to Our Lady (Mary). I was deeply grateful and delighted to accept her generous Gift.

As an aside (or is it?), her daughter has been very, very sick so I had no idea when 

her package of care might arrive.

Well guess what?

It came today!! I knew to expect the labyrinth book and beautiful blue sun catcher. 

I did not expect to find Love, Peace, and Faith all tucked in as well, or the words on 

her card “unnumbered blessings give my spirit voice.” I’m so struck by the timing of 

their arrival, right a group call for an online class that I'm taking that focused on 

Love and Faith. Smiling softly because my secret wish for our earth before Freedom 

emerged was Peace.

Hmmmmm... she says playfully. 

My guardian angel stopping in

to give me the big hug I longed for?  

Yes, I believe so. 

Blessed be.

.            *            .

Blessing of My Throat

A close up of Mary today

on this, the feast day of St. Blaise.

I made a point to attend mass

this morning

because it felt important 

to have my voice blessed.

Father may not have known

what he was doing.

But I did.

Blessed be.

.            *           .

To Bless the Space Between Us - Do you see it?

(Because I didn't ... at first.)

So yesterday morning I was taking a photo of the picture of this dear young girl, 

my gentle teacher quietly reminding me to "Bless the Space Between [my sister, 

who has stepped w-a-y back from our relationship, and me]" propped up against 

the lamp right here next to my chair. Other than moving my clear little flowerpot 

shaped votive holder (reminding me to Cultivate Joy, my word for this year), 

I didn't move a thing.

Cropping my morning photo down to a square, I saw it.

Mary *is* looking out from behind "me." I love that she's a little above me, too,

so she can see both thru my eyes and also beyond me (for me).... she can see 

farther out than what I can see. Ah, yes... *She* can offer love to my sister and 

bless the space between us on the days when I simply cannot because the reality 

is sometimes the years-long space between us hurts.

And behind her is the gentle reminder, "Let Yourself Be Held", a tender piece 

I have loved (and clung to) for a very long time.

So then I pulled an angel card by cutting my deck: Close. I'm smiling again... *yes!* 

Mary, Mama Grace, and all of my aunties are indeed Close to me, gently caring for 

me, "looking out" for me (<-- so loving the double meaning of this one!), and watching 

over me - even when I don't/can't see or realize it.

Before tucking my angel cards back into their box, I happened to notice that right 

under Close was Mirror. I smiled to myself as I put the lid on my box and put it up 

so I could move into getting ready for my day.

A few moments later as I was showering, I thought, "No. Mirror does belong, too!" 

My little altar vignette is intentionally mirroring for me how to be (send love to my 

sister as best I can each day) and also what is happening (all my mamas and aunties 

are helping me). Then it brought a warm smile to remember that in a class I'm taking,

we were invited to look in an actual mirror.

So I went back and found Mirror and pulled it out.  

And the card under Mirror? 

 Root. 

Yes! That fits, too! My faith, which I've learned to practice with some grains of salt, 

has been a firm foundation for me. Plus looking tenderly into my eyes with the help 

of a mirror and speaking gentle encouragements to myself is something I've done

for decades. All of this, for me, is about returning to the basics... the Root of it all

Love

And under Root? 

 Receive.

Yes. 

♥ 

Sweet soul, it really is ok to simply allow Love to see thru me, let myself be held 

and trust that I am beloved and blessed.

It really, *really* is ok to simply Receive. Alls I hafta do is open my heart, as best 

I can in each moment, Pause and Let Love In.

Oh, and the Mother Mary oracle card I drew? 

Our Lady of Divine Presence.

Blessed be indeed.

.                 *                 .

Armfuls of Time

Rediscovered this book today.

And, 

man-oh-man,

was it exactly perfect timing.

Blessed be.

.          *           .

To Bless the Space Between Us . . .

This tender photo touches me so

and has become quite a guiding light

and touchstone for me, too.

How do I let go of a painful situation?

This is how...

Stand calmly, quietly in my truth,

knowing what I know.

Instead of expecting and aching

for what they can't/won't give

(for whatever reasons that might be),

choose to let it be by

sending love and warmth

(as best I can in each moment).

Shine in your own little space in the night sky,

dearest one,

all while blessing the space between us.

Help me, Mama?

Right here, Baby Girl.

Yes.

Blessed be.

.            *            .

Remembrance - Day 10 of 40

Gathering the Love

Cody was a kind soul who left our world too soon.  The last time I saw him was at my

uncle's funeral.  I'd always held a deep fondness and it'd been decades since we last

saw one another.  I was surprised to find him in tears as he hugged me.  Did he love

my uncle that much?

No, 

she says softly and tenderly.

Turns out he was that glad to see me.  Not long after my cancer was diagnosed as a 

teen his family moved away and he thought I had died many years ago.  So to him?

My standing in front of him and hugging him was a miracle!  What a blessing and 

very good reminder for me.  My life is a gift.

.      .      .      .     .

I love that these two came together.  Linda was one of the many "mamas" I gathered

around myself as mine had left.  She was a beautiful woman filled with love and, 

whenever she could, she took time to be with me.  As did many of the mothers of

the sons in our 4-H club.

Blessed be.

.               *               .

November Remembrance ~ Day 2 of 40

It's interesting that "Wrestle" came with today's names.

And that Blessing has a home snuggled up next

to St. Joseph right now.

A timely, visual reminder of 

Jacob wrestling with the angel

until he received his blessing.

Viola used to help with the family housekeeping

and meal preparation when my Daddy was a youngster.

As a teen, we re-connected with her 

and, on our first visit,

we began calling her 

Grandma Viola at my initiative.

(Always the Grandma magnet here :) )

Viola and I exchanged letters which delighted 

my pen pal's heart.

But. 

As our relationship drew on,

there was a lot of pressure coming from her 

about when and how often I wrote.

It got to the point where I felt resentful 

and didn't want to write to her anymore.

For whatever reasons, I was unable to let go.

So the reality is that there is some "ick" that arises 

when I think of her.

Ah, more wrestling to be done.  

Which is why I included her...

a gentle reminder that healing 

can and does continue after one of us 

has passed beyond the veil.

Dexter was my first angel.

The ambulance had just deposited me back in the hospital,

a place I did not want to be

but I was very sick so it's where I needed to be.

Being still so new to Georgia

and a brand new bride, I wanted to get on with my life.

I didn't want to have to continue to fight

the massive infection.

It was the worst I'd experienced

and second worst the doctor at Emory,

who traveled around the world teaching 

about how to treat big-time infections,

had ever seen. 

Sobbing from the excruciating pain 

(both the worst bodily pain I'd ever been in

but also deep, emotional pain) 

in my new bed on the wrong floor, 

Dexter arrived.

I held out my hand and he just held it 

for me as I cried, 

and I cried,

and I cried.

A couple of times I tried to stop crying

but he told me, "No!  You need to cry."

Not only was he right, 

he stayed with me until I was done.

Smiling softly as Wrestle fits for him, too.

The only time I ever saw him again

was the day his rotation ended.

He had come to apologize that he hadn't been

back to see me, saying that he just couldn't 

bring himself to come back.

A kind gesture to be sure.

And yet it didn't matter to me.

What *did* matter was he was there

when I most needed him to be.  

So while he may have wrestled,

I did not.

I tried to stay in touch with him,

she adds sadly, but he never wrote back.

So I let him go.  

I wish him well in his continued ministry.

Blessed be.

.           *           .

Shutter Happy ~ Day 12 ~ A Hobby

It brings me great pleasure to pair a quote 

or a prayer that I love with pretty clip art.

Another favorite hobby of mine 

is collecting hearts. 

❤️

#shutterhappy

.          *          .

Breathe September 2017 :: Day 10 - Joy

May the blessing of Joy abide within you. 

May the blessing of Peace rest upon you.

May the blessing of Love flow out through you.

May all the blessings of Grace be yours.

~unknown

#BreatheSeptember2017

🌻   .   ❤️  .   🌻

.          *        .

An Anniversary and Two Letters

Today marks my 13th anniversary of working at my company. (Brady Ware is the 

one that acquired us on January 1). 

Something I'm not sharing more publicly just yet is that today is also the day that 

I turned in my resignation. 

The company is moving our location to a new area on Sept 16 that, turns out, is just 

too far for me to drive. 

In fact, it was our managing partner, Teresa, who kindly took a few moments three 

weeks ago to pull me aside and say "the closer we get to our move date, the more 

and more concerned I'm getting about you." She's dreading the drive herself and also 

knows that, with my being permanently on crutches, I can feel pretty vulnerable 

(and anxious) behind the wheel and I that do my best to avoid heavy traffic. 

At her suggestion, hubby and I drove up there and it took *45 minutes* one way on 

a Sunday afternoon so that's without Atlanta traffic. 

Just that realization alone 

knocked the wind out of me. 

While it took me a couple more weeks to come to peace with it, I had a sense then 

that I'd need to let go. Before I did that, just like Jacob wrestled with the angel until 

he received his blessing (and walked away with a limp to remind him of the struggle), 

I asked all the questions I could possibly think of that would allow me to stay. Could 

I work 2 or even 3 days from home? (We were all issued laptops so it wasn't too far 

fetched). Could I be trained to do something else? Teresa was willing to consider all 

of my questions and even discreetly brought in a gentleman from the home office. 

In the end, it just wasn't going to work and I do understand and appreciate their 

reasons.

So today my supervisor and I traded letters. I gave her my sincere and honoring letter 

of resignation and she gave me a very kind letter of recommendation from Teresa. In 

fact, tears pricked as I read her glowing last review of me and my work.

I feel sad and I really, Really don't want to job hunt. 

I am also feeling a deep sense of peace about it all. 

So there we be ... 

Please know, kind friend, 

that I'm grateful for your witness. 

(Again)

❤️

.          *          .

Held

.          *          .

3 Mary's in One Morning

Our sweet chapel Mary,

who, without realizing it, when sitting next to my friend,

I had sat directly in front of her.

A true blessing on a day when I was feeling down.

You recognize my very favorite Mary

standing in her small prayer garden, yes?

(I knew that you would!)

And we had a special guest in the sanctuary 

in honor of

the 100th Anniversary of 

Our Lady of Fatima.

Blessed be.

.            *           .

St. Joseph, Pray for Us

With my Daddy's name being Joseph, 

and all of his 5 daughters 

being affectionately called by our first name plus "Jo," 

and his son being named Joseph, too, 

I've come to think of St. Joseph 

as our family's personal patron saint.

It brought a warm smile 

to realize this evening 

that this is the 5th St. Joseph 

I've been this close to in the last 11 days.

St. Joseph, 

pray for us 

and please continue to guide 

and watch over us. 

 Amen. 

🙏🏻

.         *        .

Welcome Home, Sis

Daddy's spare bedroom has so many warm memories in it, offering its own sense of 

"welcome home, sis."

I was itty bitty (3?) when Moma and Daddy bought the braided rug on the floor. I still 

remember sitting on it and riding it like a horsey when they first brought it home to our 

pink and white trailer house while it was still rolled up in our living room. 

The white dresser was a gift from a friend right after my cancer was discovered when I 

was 15. Knowing I would be spending a lot of time recovering at home, several kind 

folks joined together to spiff up my room. Along with this dresser there was new carpet 

put in as well.

The quilt on the bed is one of many that my sister, Lisa, has lovingly made. While she 

crafted this one for Daddy, hubby and I get to snuggle under its warmth every time we 

come so, in it's own way, it, too, has become an old, treasured companion.

Blessed be.

.         *          .

Welcoming Our Newest Little Lamb

Baptized our sweet niece, 

Juniper Hope, 

this morning. 

 May she always walk 

in God's Light, Beauty, Joy, 

and Grace.

.         *        .

Blessing Basking

On my way in this morning, 

I pulled over close, 

stopped for just a minute, 

rolled my window down

 and allowed my 4 Sisters 

to love on me a little bit. 

Our weekdays together are numbered 

as our office will be moving soon. 

(No date yet)

..

Blessed be. 

🌳🌳🌳🌳

.         *             .

Little Help

Always grateful for the motorized carts that so many stores provide. 

Especially on a full list kinda day.

.                  *                 .

Happy Birthday, Aimee!!

Today is my first baby sister's birthday! 

She and I are 10 years apart and she's always been such a dear. 

This photo is from our trip back 17 years ago 

for her wedding and she's holding the cross stitch picture

that I made for her. 

Whenever we go back for a visit, she makes every effort 

to be there with us as much as she possibly can 

and brings her three sweet daughters with her. 

This touches my heart so much 

and whenever I thank her, 

she always smiles fondly 

and tells me she wants her girls to know 

and love me, too. 

Blessed be. 

Love you, sister! 

❤️. 🎂. 🌺. 😘

.         *          .

Hope will Find You, Deb

So I picked up a small navy notebook that's been sitting on top of this little stack of books 

for a good while now. Having looked up what I was wondering, and not thinking too much 

about it, I put the notebook down and went on with my afternoon journaling.

Taking a pause to look around between thoughts a few moments later, I was taken by 

surprise to find just the words of comfort that I need during this time of transition and 

struggle with the unknown at work (our company was bought out the first of the year).

Smiling softly as the uncovered message felt like a secret treasure and very well-timed 

gift of Grace. Right here next to me, below my mandala that I named "Sheltered in the 

Cave of the Heart," the two books were offering me their quiet assurance: "Hope will 

find you", Deb. Just remember - "Present over Perfect" and All will be well.

.

Ah, blessed be. 

💕

.          *          .

April Love 2017 :: Day 23 - Bookshelf

There's a shelf under the table next to my chair 

and some of my most favorite books live here, 

making it very easy to pick them up again and again.

(and again)

#aprillove2017

.             *             .