Armfuls of Time

Rediscovered this book today.

And, 

man-oh-man,

was it exactly perfect timing.

Blessed be.

.          *           .

Savouring January - Day 18 - Drink

Slaking this morning’s thirst 

while keeping the icy chill at bay 

with a hand-warming mug of creamy chai tea.

Rediscovering an old favorite cup 

tucked in the back of our kitchen cabinet 

has me smiling big 

as I bask in the wonderful, Joy-filled surprise. 

Blue!! 

Purple!! 

And sweet flowers!! 

(All my favorites)

Throughout my day, 

I almost always have 

a cup of cool water to drink nearby. 

A couple of other 

reliable thirst quenchers for me 

are a lit candle 

and writing in my journal, 

all while under the gracious sheltering presence 

of Mama Grace’s gentle gaze.

Delighting in the dance.

#SavouringJanuary2018

.             *             .

Savouring January - Day 11 - Thoughts

Sometimes I don’t even know what I think 

until I start writing.

Taking the time to put pen to paper 

(or fingers to keyboard) 

often helps me to untangle 

what’s going on inside of me.

Having a lit candle nearby 

reminds me that this really is prayer 

and that I am never alone 

when I pour out my heart on the page. 

I am deeply grateful for my journal, 

my trusted, faithful friend and witness.

Blessed be.

#SavouringJanuary2018

.            *            .

Savouring January - Day 5 - Move

Whenever I move into a new journal, 

my long-held tradition 

is to start by making the first page into a calendar. 

And the next page? 

That one is a prayer asking for blessings and guidance, 

both for time spent on the pages and off.

#SavouringJanuary2018

.             *             .

Be Strong, Be Brave, Be You

Our suitcases have been emptied

and most of the laundry has been done.  

Along with going thru our pictures 

in the last 3 days,

I've just about filled this little 40 page notebook

with snatches and snippets 

and feelings and thoughts

about our recent trip to visit my family

for our nephew's graduation.

Such a welcomed companion 

and quiet reminder

during this, the first phase

 of my emotional and spiritual unpacking.

💕

.          *          .

Welcoming Orange!

Intentionally welcoming and celebrating the color Orange. 

🍊      .      🏮     .     🔶

...

It's kinda feeling like an orange surprise party over here 

as all 4 of these arrived this morning.

 I remembered the notebooks (soon to be journals) were orange

 and a wide grin spread to see the books have some orange on them too. 

After sharing this photo on social media,

a dear one commented that Orange is a juicy color.

I'd never thought about it that way

but I like it!

I like it a lot!

#grounded2017

.           *           .

Everyday Beauty :: Compassion

I was awake in the wee hours this morning, struggling. A gremlin in my head kept telling 

me, in a very convincing tone (as gremlins do), that something I had shared was way too 

much. (a very old voice, this one). 

Not being able to sleep, I got up, pulled out my journal and, as I've been learning in a 

course I'm taking, I practiced giving myself the soothing gift of self-compassion. I opened 

to a blank page and, just as a loving Mama would tenderly gather her fearful child close, I

began to write. I was able to gently reassure both myself and that very old part of my 

brain, who is just trying to keep me safe in the only way she knows how, that while it 

may not have been received as I'd hoped, it really was ok.

And after writing a few pages while practicing deep, calming breaths?  I felt so, *so* 

much better.

Blessed be. 

❤️

#everydaybeauty

.              *                 .

Being Seen :: Voice

I misread the time for our nephew's tee-ball game this morning (by 2-1/2 hours!), not 

realizing it until I pulled into the parking lot and didn't see any 7-year old's wearing orange 

shirts and gray pants. 

I'd been feeling a longing to do some more processing via writing about our recent trip to 

Texas so rather than drive the 25 minutes back home, I went to a nearby store and bought 

a cute polka dotted spiral notebook (on sale!), a pen, and a bottle of water. I then parked 

under a nearby tree and wrote 6 pages, front and back. 

Wanting to capture and honor the memory of this self-care move, I took several selfies. 

In looking back at what I had, a wide smile spread to see the sunlight reflecting off a 

nearby car. That it highlighted my mouth felt like a gift. 

Yes. 

For me, writing is a very real way 

for my voice and my heart to Be Seen. 

💕

.               *                .

Being Seen :: Tears

I took this photo this morning before I got up to get in the shower. I had just written a note to

myself of all of my fears and then, as invited in our Being Seen e-course, I folded it up so that

all of my fears were tucked inside.  As Brene Brown has taught me to do, I then wrote a 

permission slip on a blue post-it note, taped it to the top of my fears and held it to my heart 

along with a sweet little red heart that was close by.

When I was in daily mass a short while later, a ritual that comforts, blesses, and soothes me, 

and on my way to communion, I accidentally tripped and fell back onto the chair behind me. 

I am permanently on crutches and pretty solid on them so it was startling for me, and three 

women from three different directions rushed to me to see if I was ok.

While grateful for their concern to be sure, I felt embarrassed and also annoyed and frustrated 

with myself. One kind-hearted woman sensed my discomfort and warmly shrugged it off with 

a "it just happens sometimes" which was such a gift.

Returning from communion and sitting in my seat, I was surprised to have tears well. I reminded myself that this was a safe space and there was at least 10 minutes before mass was over so 

it was ok to let them fall. (hmmm.... tears well as I type). I think if I had been alone, I might've 

sobbed (we are headed to Texas for a short visit with my family later this week and work has 

been so tough for four months now with a new supervisor.  The transition simply isn't going
well for me). 

I had planned some errands after mass but was still pretty shaken up so I came on home and 

laid down. Afterwards, I looked at this picture and was surprised to see that in reality? 

The tears were already right there . . .

. . . here.

.              *               .

August Break 2015 :: Listening

When getting ready in the mornings, 

I'm currently listening to Mark Nepo's 

"Reduced to Joy." 

I am really enjoying his calm voice 

and gently wise insights. 

Another way I listen 

is by writing in my journal. 

.             *            .

Filling Up My Well, Looking With Love, and Enough

Filling up my well 

with deep breaths 

on a beautiful summer Sunday morning. 

So grateful for 

the witness 

of our kind grandmother trees 

and happy birdsong. 

#fivedeepbreaths 

(Well, maybe more than 5)

Today's assignment in Liz's Water Your Mama Soul 

is to take a photo looking at ourselves with love.

As someone who has long struggled 

to find room (and permission) 

for herself and her needs in her own life,

 this particular prompt 

is so nourishing for me 

to come back to again and again. 

and again. 

❤

Hmmmm . . . .

reckon Grandmother tree 

is trying to tell me something?

Ok, ok . . . 

Enough time on the computer.

.            *           .

Everyday Beauty :: Growth

Journaling has been such an incredible gift of companionship for me. This closet shelf holds just a small number of the spiral notebooks filled with my feelings, thoughts, hopes, prayers, and dreams of the last 38 years.

The blank pages provide a safe and welcoming space to document and watch my growth.  I truly don't know where I'd be without this practice.

.            *             .

Imbolc Mandala Prayer Collage

So Saturday I rested

(and rested).

I also played with my Mandala Prayer Collage, 

a part of the Imbolc mini-retreat in my new Celtic-based e-course, Sacred Seasons.

I am *so* looking forward to the year-long rhythm of following 

and honoring the seasons within a community!

It speaks deeply to my farmer's daughter, 

cradle Catholic heart.

I loved the instruction to work within a circle *and* to use only one magazine, both exercises meant to nudge me to intentionally prioritize.  It was a very good and timely lesson for me to practice discerning and listening for Enough.  Knowing in my *bones* that I'm ready for some attention to what is growing inside of me, I chose a February magazine thinking it would probably have a lot of spring-like pictures, especially budding flowers.

I found the just-beginning-to-bloom tulips first ~ yay, they're pink (my favorite)! ~ and knew they would probably be a central part of my collage.  I so love the photos of both little girls in front of the white, airy windows on either side.  The fresh flowers bring a comforting sigh of relief and Touch is one of my love languages.  As I played with what to put in my circle, I found I needed ... *craved,* really .... all of the white space.  Smiling because, at one point, I tried coloring in the left-hand side with a green colored pencil.  Right after I finished I knew that it needed to go so I erased it.

I'm hungry... so hungry! ... for a new rhythm.  An ease-ier, peace-filled, spacious rhythm that isn't centered all-consumingly on work and things that need to be done here at home.  I ache for a rhythm that is clean and simple, naturally beautiful.  I also knew I wanted to gently surround myself ~ creating a safe container ~ with a brown border, the color of earth rich in vital nutrients necessary for new seeds and tender, spring plants.  It's my sense that it's a visual way of reminding myself to stay within, tending my own heart and life, a poignant way to remember that it's ok to have some things remain private, secret, and sacred.

So as I've learned with soul collage:

I am the one who is touch (and needs touch)

I am the one who's life is a new rhythm

I am the one who is beautiful pink blossoms, patiently awaiting her time to bloom

     (it'll be here before I know it)

I am the one who is naturally beautiful, a lovely pink flower

I am the one who sits, and speaks, and reads, and studies, and learns, and rests, 

     and grows, and dreams in front of the freshness of an airy white window

I am the one who is clean and simple.

And lookie here how much better and more at peace I feel:

Truly I am blessed

And deeply grateful.

.          *          .

Habit ~ CY365

Journaling has been such a life-saver

(and heart-soother)

for me over the decades.

I've gotten out of the habit

in the last little while

and it was so good

to spend some time writing

this afternoon.

.        *         .