What If . . .

What if . . . 

rather than it was just as it was meant to be

rather than my being "too big" one more time

What if . . .

no matter how much I ached

and longed

and hoped 

~ for more ~

(did she ache, and long, and hope, too?)

What if . . .

given her own history

she simply had no more to give

What if . . .

given my history 

it was hard to understand that,
once again,

it truly wasn't personal

What if . . .

it was all that it *could* be

just as it was

Can holiness, 

~ wholeness ~

be found

in the midst of 

human imperfection

What if . . .

in time,

the rough edges will smooth and soften

and a peace,

~ a blessed assurance, ~

will bathe,

and bind

and heal

Blessing both of our broken hearts.

~ May it be so ~

(and may she rest in peace)

Good-bye, sweet Faye.

I love you.

(tears)

.         *          .